I don’t think I look up enough, especially in the winter. I mean literally look up. Today I looked up when walking into the back hall and realized I had never seen the lack of a light fixture cover. Has it always been like that? It seems brighter than normal, is it really?
Of course this post is not about the light in my back hall. (Update: the fixture only looked new because usually the automatic sensor turns on the other light and I had accidentally turned on the manual one!)
When I was walking Marley tonight I was happy to take things slowly – at her speed. On one of her 10,000 stops to sniff this or that deeply, and gather all her doggie information, I looked up. What a saw was a beautiful sky full of stars. Yes, I have seen this before and been blown away in awe by it every time, but tonight it really struck me.
We are all just such a small part of this incredibly vast universe. I am only 1 of the 7,069,422,727 (and growing) people in this world. Our stress, our “important” tasks at work, is only a fraction of a fraction of what matters.
Of course our day to day lives matter, of course we each matter, but something about looking up, seeing the moon and the stars (and wishing on a few stars that something I am hoping for at work happens), I realized (if only for a moment) that it’s all really just so much more than each of us individually. That a dozen, if not a hundred factors play into every decision.
In the big scheme of things while technology is great and certain technologies can save lives, the technology I work with does not. No one, I repeat no one, is going to die if they can’t access a file for 5 minutes, or even for 5 hours. But that is not how things are often treated at my place of work.
Everything has to be RIGHT NOW! BIGGER! BETTER! FASTER! It is exhausting, and quite frankly I feel like I cannot do my best work because I have SO MUCH of it to do.
This isn’t about me feeling overwhelmed at work. Believe it or not I am rolling with it better than ever these days. It is about me feeling a strong desire to do more that matters. Now as much as I would like I cannot quit my job and go work for my dream job, saving all the animals that need it, but I can find a way to do more work in program related areas rather than making technology BIGGER, BETTER, FASTER, NOW!
More on this later…..